Sunday, July 24, 2011

Lord, send the rain.

I don't even know how to describe the season I've been in.  It's been hard dealing with school, work, multiple roommate switches, and just when I think I've got one thing figured out and a load off my shoulders, a whole new batch of problems comes crashing on me.  I've been in a drought in my spiritual life, its pretty sad, and I'm not at all proud of where I am. There's a yearning in my heart for more of what I had before, but my flesh takes over and I find myself fulfilling worldly desires with the movies I watch, the books I read, and the music I listen to.  I turned on some worship music and decided to clean out and organize the hallway closet.  It's been sooooo hot and dry here, when I heard thunder I was excited because we desperately need the rain.  It thundered yesterday but never rained, so I didn't really think much about it.  While cleaning, I found a huge box that had a bunch of text books that I had saved along with some of my old journals that I had filled during high school and college.  This is where I poured my heart out to the Lord, a welcomed habit that I had somehow, unfortunately broken.  I got up to throw something away in the kitchen, reading a journal entry as a walked.  When I turned around to walk back, I looked out and the rain was POURING down! Just as the rain was falling, tears were rolling down my cheeks. I ran out onto the balcony and stood hanging over the railing so I could feel the rain.  I realize I probably looked ridiculous to anyone who may have passed by, but the worship in the background and having read the old journal entries made for a beautiful moment.  And I just had to feel the rain.  I need a refreshing from the Lord and I know that I need to give him opportunity to do it.  I'm letting myself get bogged down by the weight of the world and it's troubles.  I just need to sit and be with the Father, letting His refreshing Spirit wash over me.  

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